场景动作描写
【23-24天一大联考三月】After carefully examining the situation, and with no cellphone service to call for outside assistance, the group of international students came to the decision of unwinding the long turbans—their traditional headgear. They managed to fashion a 33-foot lifeline, with which they were eventually able to fish the pair out of their situation.
亮点结构：after doing+with介词短语；come to the decision；manage to do sth.；with which的定从表达；fish the pair out of their situation，fish一词尤为亮眼。
（2024•重庆一模）Soon we discovered that carolling brought various responses. Sometimes we were greeted with open doors and open hearts，while other times，folks remained in the safety and cosiness of their homes，watching passively through their windows.
亮点结构：bring various responses带来不同反馈；with open doors and open hearts虚实结合；while表对比关系；remain in the safety and cosiness待在安全舒适地方；passively被动式
动作描写
（2024•沙坪坝区校级模拟）She told me she chose no one，adding she'd rather have a friend or family member snap a few candid （抓拍的） shots and pick from them.
亮点结构：adding补充信息；would rather宁愿；have sb. do sth.让某人做某事
（2024•皇姑区校级二模）When my turn came，I jumped at the chance.I ran forward and gave her the biggest hug with tearful eyes.Grandma，holding me tightly in her arms，said， "I know there's a chance I won't make it，but I love you forever." I comforted her， "Don't worry，honey.We are all waiting for you here." Then she was wheeled away，leaving us waiting and praying anxiously.
亮点结构：when my turn came即it's my turn的变形表达；jump at the chance抓住机会；with tearful eyes泪眼的介词短语表达；there is a chance I won't make it中make it表达成功，用词灵活。
（2024•皇姑区校级二模）Relief swept over my body and tears began rolling down my face.
亮点结构：relief swept over my body如释重负；rolling down my face落泪动作描写
（2024•重庆一模）We stepped briskly upward into the couple's little apartment.Books，records，and antique furniture whispered stories to us.I reminded myself not to stare for fear of showing disrespect to them.
Sitting beside his wife，the gentleman gave us a nod.Then our voices rose and lingered around their small home.Had our voices been given extra energy and beauty for this occasion？Perhaps they had.
A smile flickered on the woman's skinny，yet beautiful face.She snuggled her head against her husband's shoulder and both of them heartily enjoyed our performance.Witnessing such a heartwarming scene，we felt it was a holy night，for we were in the presence of love that was gentle and mild.
亮点结构：briskly轻快地；whisper stories to us低语诉说故事；for fear of害怕；give sb. a nod点头；voices rose and lingered声音响起并环绕周遭；flicker闪烁【传神的微笑】; skinny瘦骨嶙峋的；snuggle her head against将头依偎在……；in the presence of love that was gentle and mild以爱为名
心理描写
（2024•沙坪坝区校级模拟）I could have picked a photo my daughter didn't like and submitted it behind her back，but I knew it wouldn't have worked well.So I didn't do that.
亮点结构：could have done本可以……；behind her back背着某人；wouldn't have done二次虚拟；work well效果不错
结尾价值提升
助人脱离困境
【23-24天一大联考三月】It was simply a matter of being in the right place at the right time and having the means to help. We are taught to help someone in any way we can with anything we possess.
亮点结构：a matter of being; being和having的并列结构；两个right；in any way we can with anything we possess两个介词短语+定从表达。
亲子关系感悟
（2024•沙坪坝区校级模拟）My daughter is old enough to make such a decision on her own.It's her senior year.The fact that she doesn't want to hand in a senior portrait for the graduation album doesn't mean there's anything wrong with her.I need to let her do her thing.
I had my senior year and did it the way I wanted.Now it's my daughter's turn.
亮点结构：old enough to do sth.即adj. enough to do sth.；the fact that …. doesn't mean….；it's her turn代际间的价值观传递
个人成长
（2024•长沙一模）"If we see something wrong with the world，we should do something about it，" she said. "After all，the only one stopping us from doing something is ourselves."
亮点结构：after all毕竟；the only one stopping …. is ourselves自我肯定
（2024•潍坊一模）Most importantly，cycling taught me to know myself better.It eventually dawned on me that I had more toughness and courage than I ever imagined.The self﹣awareness and long﹣lasting memories will give me enormous power as I carry on my life journey.
亮点结构：most importantly最重要的是；dawn on me恍然大悟；more…than I ever imagined远超我曾经的想象；enormous power无穷的力量
