大学生英语六级真题翻译 练习

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大学生英语六级真题翻译 练习
【题目】尊老是中华民族的传统美德,深深植根于中国人的思想和行为中,是人们普遍遵守的行为规范和社会准则。在当今的中国,这种美德得到广泛传承。社会各界积极营造敬老助老的社会氛围。为老年人提供便利服务已成为社会共识,例如社区专门开设长者食堂,公共场所配置优先座位。政府还出台了一系列政策,为老年人的权益提供有力保障。尊老是社会和谐与发展的重要基石,有助于培育良好的社会氛围,推动整个社会文明进步。
我的译文:Serving as a traditional virtue of the Chinese nation, respecting the elder is deeply rooted in Chinese thoughts and behaviours and becomes widely observed codes of conduct and social norms. In today's society, China witnesses a widespread inheritance of this virtue. Every part of society proactively creates social atmosphere of revering and assisting the old. It is a social consensus to provide senior citizens with convenient sevices such as opening canteens of the elder in communities and installing priority seats in public areas. Governments also introduce a series of policies to offer a powerful guarantee for the elder's rights and interests. Respecting the elder is a vital backbone of social harmony and development, which is conducive to nurturing favourable social atmosphere and boosting cultural advancement of society as a whole.
参考译文:Respecting the elderly is a traditional virtue of the Chinese nation, deeply rooted in the thoughts and actions of Chinese people, acting as a widely observed behavioral norm and social principle. In contemporary China, this virtue continues to be widely passed down. All sectors of society actively foster a social atmosphere of valuing and supporting the elderly. Providing convenient services for older adults has become a societal consensus—for instance, communities have established dedicated senior canteens, and priority seating is available in public spaces. The government has also implemented a series of policies to provide strong safeguards for the rights and interests of the elderly. Respecting the elderly serves as a crucial cornerstone for social harmony and development, contributing to the cultivation of a positive social atmosphere and promoting social progress and civilization.

一、拼写与语法错误

  1. 拼写错误:sevices → 应为 services(在 convenient sevices 中)。

  2. 冠词缺失:creates social atmosphere → 应为 creates a social atmosphere(atmosphere 可数,需加 a)。同样,nurturing favourable social atmosphere 也缺少 a。

  3. 名词单复数问题:codes of conduct and social norms 中 codes 和 norms 都是复数,但前面 becomes 主语是 respecting the elder(单数概念),逻辑上“尊老”是一种行为规范,应该用单数 a code of conduct and a social norm。我的译文用复数 becomes... codes,主谓不一致且语义奇怪。参考译文用 acting as a widely observed behavioral norm and social principle,单数。

  4. 冠词误用:Chinese thoughts and behaviours 中 thoughts 和 behaviours 为抽象复数,不加冠词可以接受,但通常说 thoughts and actions。

  5. 用词错误:the elder 应该为 the elderly。英文中 the elderly 是固定说法,表示老年人群体。the elder 通常指“长辈”或“年长者”,但不如 the elderly 正式和常用。通篇多处使用 the elder,应统一改为 the elderly。

  6. 表达不自然:canteens of the elder → 应为 canteens for the elderly 或 senior canteens。参考译文用 dedicated senior canteens。

  7. 大小写/名词形式:Governments 首字母大写,但这里不是专有名词,用 governments 或 the government(单数指政府整体)。参考译文用 The government has also implemented。

  8. 时态不一致:第一句 is rooted... and becomes(一般现在时),第二句 witnesses(一般现在时),最后两句 introduce(一般现在时)。但参考译文最后一句用 serves as(一般现在时),可以接受。不过注意“出台了一系列政策”用 has also implemented(现在完成时)更符合“已经出台”的含义。我的译文用 introduce(一般现在时)不够准确。

  9. 介词搭配:a powerful guarantee for the elder's rights → 通常说 guarantee of rights 或 guarantee for the protection of rights,但 for 可以接受。参考译文用 strong safeguards for。

  10. 名词可数性:social atmosphere 前面需要冠词,如上所述。另外 favourable social atmosphere 也缺冠词。

二、我对照参考译文发现的翻译不到位之处

  1. “尊老”我的译文:respecting the elder / respecting the elderly参考译文:Respecting the elderly问题:我多次使用 the elder,应改为 the elderly。另外参考译文首句直接以 

  2. “深深植根于中国人的思想和行为中”我的译文:deeply rooted in Chinese thoughts and behaviours参考译文:deeply rooted in the thoughts and actions of Chinese people问题:thoughts and behaviours 可以,但参考译文用 actions 更具体。另外 my version 缺少 the,虽然可接受,但参考译文有 the thoughts and actions 更规范。还有 Chinese people 比 Chinese 更明确。

  3. 是人们普遍遵守的行为规范和社会准则我的译文:and becomes widely observed codes of conduct and social norms(复数,主谓不一致)参考译文:acting as a widely observed behavioral norm and social principle问题:我使用 becomes 与前面 is rooted 并列,但语义上“尊老是一种美德,植根于...,成为行为规范”可以接受,但用 becomes 不如参考译文的 acting as 自然。更严重的是我的复数错误。另外 norms 和准则(principle)也有细微差别。

  4. “在当今的中国,这种美德得到广泛传承”我的译文:In today's society, China witnesses a widespread inheritance of this virtue参考译文:In contemporary China, this virtue continues to be widely passed down问题:我的译文说“中国见证了这种美德的广泛传承”,虽然可以,但主语是 China,且用 witnesses 略显拟人化。参考译文直接说“这种美德继续被广泛传承”,更简洁且贴近原文被动含义。另外 inheritance 通常指“继承(遗产)”,pass down 更准确。

  5. “社会各界”我的译文:Every part of society参考译文:All sectors of society问题:Every part of society 意思通,但 all sectors of society 是标准表达。

  6. “积极营造敬老助老的社会氛围”我的译文:proactively creates social atmosphere of revering and assisting the old参考译文:actively foster a social atmosphere of valuing and supporting the elderly问题:

  • proactively 可以。

  • revering 有“崇敬、敬畏”之意,程度过重,原文“敬”用 valuing 或 respecting 即可。

  • assisting the old 中 old 略显不敬,用 the elderly 或 older adults。

  • 缺少冠词 a:a social atmosphere。

  1. 例如社区专门开设长者食堂,公共场所配置优先座位”我的译文:such as opening canteens of the elder in communities and installing priority seats in public areas参考译文:for instance, communities have established dedicated senior canteens, and priority seating is available in public spaces问题:

  • canteens of the elder 表达错误,应为 canteens for the elderly 或 senior canteens。

  • 参考译文使用两个并列分句,主动态(communities have established)和被动态(priority seating is available),更灵活。我的译文用 opening 和 installing 两个动名词,虽然可以但略显呆板。

  • “配置优先座位”我的 installing priority seats 可以,但参考译文 priority seating is available 更地道(seating 不可数,表示座位设施)。

  1. “政府还出台了一系列政策,为老年人的权益提供有力保障”我的译文:Governments also introduce a series of policies to offer a powerful guarantee for the elder's rights and interests参考译文:The government has also implemented a series of policies to provide strong safeguards for the rights and interests of the elderly问题:

  • Governments 首字母大写且用复数,不合适。用 the government。

  • introduce 应为 have introduced 或 has implemented。参考译文用 has implemented(现在完成时)。

  • a powerful guarantee 可以,但 safeguards 更常用(复数,多项保障措施)。

  • for the elder's rights → for the rights of the elderly 更自然。

  1. 尊老是社会和谐与发展的重要基石”我的译文:Respecting the elder is a vital backbone of social harmony and development参考译文:Respecting the elderly serves as a crucial cornerstone for social harmony and development问题:

  • backbone 多指“支柱、脊梁”,可以,但 cornerstone(基石)更符合“基石”比喻。

  • vital 与 crucial 相近,但参考译文用 serves as 更正式。

  1. “有助于培育良好的社会氛围,推动整个社会文明进步”我的译文:which is conducive to nurturing favourable social atmosphere and boosting cultural advancement of society as a whole参考译文:contributing to the cultivation of a positive social atmosphere and promoting social progress and civilization问题:

  • which is conducive to 较为正式,可以接受。

  • cultural advancement 误译!原文“社会文明进步”中的“文明”是 civilization,不是文化。我写成 cultural advancement(文化进步)偏离原意。参考译文用 social progress and civilization,正确。

三、词块积累

  • 尊老 → respecting the elderly

  • 传统美德 → traditional virtue

  • 深深植根于 → deeply rooted in

  • 思想和行为 → thoughts and actions

  • 行为规范和社会准则 → behavioral norm and social principle

  • 在当今的中国 → in contemporary China

  • 广泛传承 → be widely passed down

  • 社会各界 → all sectors of society

  • 营造……氛围 → foster a... atmosphere

  • 敬老助老 → valuing and supporting the elderly

  • 便利服务 → convenient services

  • 社会共识 → societal consensus

  • 长者食堂 → senior canteens / dedicated canteens for the elderly

  • 优先座位 → priority seating

  • 出台政策 → implement policies

  • 提供有力保障 → provide strong safeguards

  • 权益 → rights and interests

  • 重要基石 → crucial cornerstone

  • 社会和谐与发展 → social harmony and development

  • 培育良好社会氛围 → cultivation of a positive social atmosphere

  • 推动社会文明进步 → promote social progress and civilization

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