4月30日安阳市第一次模拟考试落下帷幕，我最关心的还是英语试卷的最后一题--书面表达。我的直觉，学生们乍一看题目觉得这个题没见过，有些许对未知的恐惧，但实际上这个话题是平时老师们强调过的’理想‘这个主题。
但巧妙的是，这道书面表达以 “中国航天登月计划” 为载体，聚焦家国情怀、个人理想与责任担当三大核心素养，引导学生在真实语境中用英语表达对科技发展的关注，同时考查 “原因阐述 - 行动规划 - 未来展望” 的逻辑表达能力，实现 “语言运用 + 价值引领” 的双重目标。所以好的题目就是既考查学生的语言表达与逻辑思维能力，又激发青少年对航天事业的关注，树立为国家发展贡献力量的远大理想。
下面让我们直接进入高分现场：
【安阳一模】书面表达（20 分）
最近，中国航天事业（space industry）取得了举世瞩目的成就，特别是 “登月计划” 激发了广大青少年的科学梦想。你们学校英文报社正在以 “My Moon Landing Dream” 为主题开展英语征文活动。你也渴望参加未来的 “登月计划”，请你根据以下要点提示，用英语写一篇短文投稿。
写作要点：
你想参加登月计划的原因； 你将为此做哪些准备； 你对未来的憧憬。
写作要求：
文中须包含要点提示，可适当发挥； 文中不得出现考生的真实姓名和学校名称； 词数 100 左右。
My Moon Landing Dream
高分范文展示
范文一（稳拿满分・结构清晰版）
My Moon Landing Dream
With China’s space industry making world-famous progress, especially the moon landing project, I have been deeply inspired to pursue my space dream. I long to join the mission because I want to explore the moon’s mysteries and contribute to our country’s space exploration, just like the great astronauts we admire.
To turn this dream into reality, I will spare no effort. I will work hard at physics and science to build a solid knowledge base. Besides, I will keep exercising daily to stay strong and healthy. I also plan to read more space-related books to broaden my horizons.
I often imagine walking on the moon, looking back at our beautiful blue Earth. I believe that as long as I keep working hard, my moon landing dream will come true one day.
【阅卷老师亮点标注】
With China’s space industry making world-famous progress... | Thanks to China’s amazing progress in space exploration... | |
I have been deeply inspired to pursue my space dream. | deeply inspiredpursue my dreamI want to 更书面、更真诚。 | |
I long to join the mission | long towant to 情感更强烈；mission 替换 plan，更贴合航天主题。 | |
contribute to our country’s space exploration | play a part in our nation’s space journey | |
To turn this dream into reality, I will spare no effort. | turn...into realityspare no effort | |
build a solid knowledge base | study hard 更具体、更贴合主题。 | |
broaden my horizons | learn more，体现词汇积累。 | |
I believe that as long as I keep working hard, my dream will come true. | as long as引导从句，逻辑完整，收束有力。 |
译文：
我的登月梦想
随着我国航天事业取得举世瞩目的成就，尤其是探月工程不断推进，我深受鼓舞，心底也萌生了属于自己的航天梦想。我渴望投身登月航天任务，想去探索月球的种种奥秘，像我们敬仰的优秀航天员那样，为国家的深空探测事业贡献自己的一份力量。
为了让这个梦想照进现实，我愿意全力以赴、不懈努力。我会刻苦学好物理和各类科学相关课程，打下扎实牢固的知识基础。除此之外，我每天都会坚持锻炼身体，保持强健的体魄和健康的身心。我还计划多读航天相关的书籍，开阔自己的眼界，积累更多航天科普知识。
我常常畅想自己漫步在月球之上，回望蔚蓝又美丽的地球家园。我坚信，只要我持之以恒、脚踏实地努力奋斗，我的登月梦想终有一天一定会实现。
范文二（冲击满分・亮点进阶版）
My Moon Landing Dream
China’s remarkable achievements in the space industry, especially the upcoming moon landing plan, have ignited my passion for space exploration. I am eager to take part in this mission, not only to satisfy my curiosity about the unknown world but also to make my own contribution to China’s space cause.
To prepare for this challenge, I will start with small steps. I will devote myself to studying science subjects carefully, as they are the foundation of space exploration. Meanwhile, I will keep a strict exercise routine to build a strong body and develop a resilient mind. I will also learn professional knowledge about space in my free time.
One day, I hope to stand on the moon, gazing at our home planet from afar. With continuous efforts, I believe my dream of landing on the moon will come true.
【阅卷老师亮点标注】
China’s remarkable achievements...have ignited my passion | remarkable achievementsignited my passiongreat progressmake me interested 更有文采，阅卷老师一眼加分。 | |
not only to satisfy my curiosity...but also to make my own contribution... | not only...but also... | |
To prepare for this challenge, I will start with small steps. | this challenge 承接上文的 “登月计划”，自然引出下文的准备，衔接流畅。 | |
devote myself to studying science subjects carefully | devote myself to doingwork hard at 更高级，体现决心。 | |
as they are the foundation of space exploration | ||
Meanwhile, I will keep a strict exercise routine to build a strong body and develop a resilient mind. | Meanwhileexercise routineresilient mind 体现词汇广度，是冲击满分的关键。 | |
gazing at our home planet from afar | looking down at our blue planet | |
With continuous efforts, I believe my dream of landing on the moon will come true. | With continuous efforts 替代简单句，简洁有力，升华主题。 |
译文：
我的登月梦想
中国航天事业取得了举世瞩目的成就，尤其是即将实施的登月计划，点燃了我对太空探索的热情。我渴望参与这项任务，不仅是为了满足自己对未知世界的好奇心，更是想为中国的航天事业贡献自己的一份力量。
为迎接这份挑战，我会从点滴小事做起。我会专心学好理科课程，因为它们是太空探索的基础。同时，我坚持规律锻炼，练就强健的体魄，磨炼坚韧的意志。课余时间，我还会学习航天相关的专业知识。
我希望有一天，能站在月球上，遥望我们赖以生存的地球家园。只要坚持不懈努力，我相信我的登月梦想终将实现。
💡 给学生的 “满分写作小贴士”
- 1.逻辑闭环：开头写 “为什么想参加”，中间写 “怎么做准备”，结尾写 “未来的憧憬”，三个要点必须全部覆盖，缺一不可。
- 2.句式多样：至少用到 1 个复合句（如 because/as/that 引导的从句）和 1 个高级结构（如 With...复合结构、not only...but also...），避免全程用简单句。
- 3.主题贴合：多用和 “航天、梦想、努力” 相关的短语，比如 space exploration contribute to turn my dream into reality，让文章更贴合主题。
