雅思写作丨大作文高分真题范文-家人和学校

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雅思写作丨大作文高分真题范文-家人和学校
【个人发展】家人和学校

题目:

The values that we learn from our parents and family have greater influence on our future success than knowledge and skills we learn at school. 

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

中文:

我们从父母和家人那里学到的价值观对我们未来的成功的影响比我们在学校学到的知识和技能更大。你在多大程度上同意或不同意?

题目解读

题目要求我们比对父母和家庭灌注的价值观和学校传授的知识和技巧对未来成功的影响,并且需要给出同意与否的个人观点。

首先,很重要的一点是,我们不光需要对某一方给出认同的立场,还需要通过比较说明认同的一方是更重要的。

如果,我们对家庭价值观才采取同意的态度,就需要说明家庭价值观对成功的具体作用,并且解释为何比学校的知识技巧更重要;反之亦然

写作框架

雅思写作丨大作文高分真题范文-家人和学校 第1张

1.开头段(Introduction)

表达同意或不同意并给出个人观点:一些人认为家庭价值观比学校所学的知识和技能对个人成功的影响更大。我认为两者都很重要,但家庭价值观在塑造个人长期成功方面起着更为重要的作用

Some argue that family values have a greater impact than the knowledge and skills learned at school. I believe both are important, but family values play a more significant role in shaping an individual's long-term success.

2.主体段

主体段1:

主题:父母灌输的价值观为个人发展奠定了基础

解释1:像毅力、纪律性和强烈的职业道德等品质,往往是在家庭中形成的

举例1:在注重辛勤工作的家庭中成长的孩子往往会培养出韧性,而这对克服障碍至关重要

举例2:虽然学校传授学术知识,但这些知识往往会过时,而坚持不懈等价值观却始终保持相关性

主体段2:

主题:家庭价值观有助于情商的培养,而情商对于个人和职业生涯的成功至关重要

解释1:父母教会我们如何管理情绪、处理冲突和建立关系

解释2:这些社交技能在当今社会中不可或缺,因为团队合作和人际沟通往往是职业成功的关键

解释3:相比之下,学校教育更多关注智力成长,而这固然重要,但并不足以应对现代生活的复杂性

主体段3:

主题:没有坚实的价值观基础,学校提供知识和技巧可能无法有效应用

解释:技能和知识固然重要,但需要配合像诚信和责任感这样的品质,这些品质通常是在家庭中学习到的

  1. 结尾段(Conclusion)

总结个人观点:虽然学术知识至关重要,我认为家庭价值观对成功的影响更加持久。这些价值观构成了个人成长的基础,因此在塑造一个人未来的成就中起着关键作用

While academic knowledge is essential, I believe family values have a more lasting impact on success. These values form the basis of personal growth, making them crucial in shaping one’s future achievements.

范文精析版

⭐️ 蓝色部分-生动动作表达:增加写作词汇丰富程

⭐️ 黄色部分-地道名词形容词表达:增加写作词汇丰富程度

⭐️ 橙色部分-必备连接词汇:增加写作连接词的积累

⭐️ 绿色部分-高级语法积累:提高写作时语法多样性和准确性

范文

In the debate about success, some argue that family values have a greater impact than the knowledge and skills learned at school. I believe both are important, butfamily values play a more significant role in shaping an individual's long-term success.

Firstly, the values instilled by parentslay the foundation for personal development. Attributes like perseverancediscipline, and a strong work ethic are often shaped at home. For instance, children raised in families that emphasize hard work tend to develop resiliencewhich is crucial for overcoming obstacles. Whileschool teaches academic knowledge, this knowledge alone often becomes outdatedwhereasvalues such aspersistenceremain relevant.

Moreover, family values contribute to emotional intelligencewhich is essential for success in both personal andprofessional life. Parents teach us how to manage emotionshandle conflicts, and build relationships. These social skills are indispensable in today’s world, where teamwork and interpersonal communication are often the key to career success. In contrast, school education focuses more on intellectual growthwhich, while important, is not enough to navigate the complexities of modern life.

Of course, school education provides essential knowledge and specialized skills for career development. However, without a solid foundation in values, such knowledge may not be effectively applied. Skills and knowledge are vital, but they need to be accompanied by qualities like integrity and responsibility, which are often learned from family.

In conclusionwhileacademic knowledge is essential, I believe family values have a more lasting impact on success. These values form the basis of personal growth, making them crucial in shaping one’s future achievements.

高分表达

生动动作表达

shaping an individual's long-term success 塑造个人长期成功

lay the foundation for 为...奠定基础

often becomes outdated 常常变得过时

remain relevant 保持相关性

manage emotions 管理情绪

handle conflicts 处理冲突

build relationships 建立关系

be accompanied by 与...一起

form the basis 形成基础

shaping one’s future achievements 塑造一个人未来的成就

地道名词形容词表达

instilled by parents 由父母灌输

perseverance 毅力

discipline 自律

a strong work ethic 强烈的工作道德

resilience 韧性

academic knowledge 学术知识

persistence 坚持

emotional intelligence 情商

indispensable 不可或缺的

intellectual growth 智力成长

navigate the complexities 应对复杂性

essential knowledge 必要的知识

specialized skills 专业技能

integrity 诚信

a more lasting impact 更持久的影响

积累

①I believe both are important, but family values play a more significant role in shaping an individual's long-term success

我认为两者都很重要,但家庭价值观(介词+doing表示状态过程)在塑造个人长期成功方面起着更为重要的作用

②For instance, children raised in families that emphasize hard work tend to develop resilience, which is crucial for overcoming obstacles.

例如,(定语从句)在注重辛勤工作的家庭中成长的孩子往往会培养出韧性,(定语从句)而这对克服障碍至关重要

③Moreover, family values contribute to emotional intelligence, which is essential for success in both personal and professional life

此外,家庭价值观有助于情商的培养,(定语从句)情商对于个人和职业生涯的成功至关重要

④These social skills are indispensable in today’s world, where teamwork and interpersonal communication are often the key to career success

这些社交技能在当今社会中不可或缺,(定语从句)团队合作和人际沟通往往是职业成功的关键

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