📚 中考作文加油站 ·第14期 （逐句精修）

在这样紧张又充实的日子里，Tony依然坚持用英语记录自己的学习与生活。
Even in such a busy and stressful time, Tony still insists on recording
his life and learning in English.

这一次，Tony 写了一篇以 “School Is a Big Family” 为主题的演讲稿。
This time, he wrote a speech titled “School Is a Big Family”.

让我们一起来看看他的原稿，以及逐句修改后的提升吧👇
Let’s take a look at his original writing and how it was improved sentence by sentence 👇

原句1
❌ First, my teacher is patient with me, she helps me a lot.
✅ 修改
✔ First, my teacher is patient with me and helps me a lot.
💡亮点：
用 and 连接 ✔（避免逗号拼句）
be patient with ✔（正确搭配）

✏️ 原句2
❌ Second, my classmates is very friendly with me.
✅ 修改
✔ Second, my classmates are very friendly to me.
💡亮点：
classmates → are ✔（主谓一致）
friendly to sb ✔（固定搭配）

✏️ 原句3
❌ My sports is not very good, my friends teacher me how to do and I do better than before.
✅ 修改
✔ I am not very good at sports, but my friends teach me how to practice, and I do better than before.
💡亮点：
be good at ✔
teacher ❌ → teach ✔
but 连接逻辑 ✔

✏️ 原句4
✔ I also care about my teacher and classmates.
👉 ✅这句很好，可以保留！

✏️ 原句5
❌ One day my friends had a cold and I told him to drink more hot water.
✅ 修改
✔ One day, one of my friends had a cold, and I told him to drink more hot water.
💡亮点：
one of my friends ✔（更准确）
加逗号更清晰

✏️ 原句6
❌ He feeled warm and thanked me.
✅ 修改
✔ He felt better and thanked me.
💡亮点：
feeled ❌ → felt ✔
felt better ✔（更自然）

✏️ 原句7
❌ If we help each other, our school is a better place.
✅ 修改
✔ If we help each other, our school will become a better place.
💡亮点：
will become ✔（更完整逻辑）

✏️ 原句8
❌ Thank you!
✅ 修改
✔ Thank you for listening!
💡亮点：
👉 演讲结尾加分表达🔥

📌 下期预告：
下一期✨展现更完整、更出彩的高分范文👇！