2026年高考英语全国卷1写作2解析

四季读书网 2026-09-19 01:09:57 9 0

2026年高考英语全国卷1写作2解析

第⼆节(满分25分)

67. 阅读下⾯材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成⼀篇完整的短⽂。

Emily Sanders, a 25-year-old from Detroit, Michigan, set out on December 23rd with high hopes of reaching

Toronto to meet her boyfriend for Christmas. Although she had heard warnings about an approaching snowstorm,

she didn’t give it much thought. She assumed that much like in Michigan, police would simply detour (使绕道)

traffic around any closed sections of the highway. But that didn’t happen. As the snow came down more and more

heavily, Emily was directed off the highway. She drove on for a while and found herself on an unfamiliar road

toward a Canadian town.

The blinding whiteout made driving nearly impossible. At one point, Emily’s car got stuck. After a struggle,

she managed to free the vehicle and continued inching along the snow-covered road. As night fell, panic set in.

While Emily was driving on a narrow stretch of road, her car slid into a ditch (沟). She tried to call for help but

found no signal on her phone. Seeing no hope of immediate rescue, Emily decided to spend the night in her car. She

wrapped herself in a blanket, waiting for morning. To stay warm, she ran her engine for a few minutes every now

and then. Eventually, she fell asleep.

Emily awoke to a gentle knock on her car window. Standing outside were Daniel and his wife Rachel, who

noticed the stranded (被困的) vehicle on their way home and stopped to see if they could help. When Emily rolled

down the window, Rachel asked if she was okay and told her it was not safe to stay overnight in the car. With

genuine warmth in her voice, Rachel said they could take Emily to a nearby cafe they knew. Grateful and relieved,

Emily accepted the offer.

In the cafe, the couple bought Emily a hot chocolate and listened patiently as she explained her desperate

situation: she was about a hundred miles from her destination, her car was completely stuck, and her entire holiday

plan could be ruined.

注意：

(1)续写词数应为150个左右。

(2)请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。

Daniel and Rachel suggested that Emily continue her journey by train.

__________________

Three days later, Emily returned to get her car.

__________________

写作示例：

Daniel and Rachel suggested that Emily continue her journey by train. And they would help to call the rescue company to pull her car out of the ditch for maintanence. Touched by the couple’s kind and timely help, Emily felt very grateful and said that she really appreciated everything they had done for her; she would follow their suggestion and carry on with her trip. After saying goodbye to Daniel and Rachel, she went to the nearest train station and got on the trian to Toronto. Luckily, by Christmas she had managed to arrive and meet her boyfriend. They spent a merry Christmas together, celebrating with family and friends.

Three days later, Emily returned to get her car. To her surprise, not only did the lovely couple arrange to pull out her car, but they also helped her get the car fixed. With a big smile on her face, Emily wanted to pay them for the trouble; however they refused and said, “You would do the same if someone travels to your town right? Don’t worry about it.” “Of course,” Emily nodded and welcomed them to travel to Michigan when possible. From this experience, Emily also learned a lesson, which is: always pay close attention to the weather report and be fully prepared before a trip.

点评：

这是一篇非常典型的、结构完整的英语高考续写习作。整体来看，你的故事情节发展符合逻辑，与所给的段落开头语衔接自然，且具备一定的句式变化意识。

以下是详细的点评、打分以及改进建议：

🎯 预估分数：20分 / 25分（属于第二档/一档下位）

🌟 优点 (Strengths)：

情节连贯，逻辑自洽：第一段顺理成章地写了接受建议、坐火车、成功与男友过圣诞；第二段紧扣“三天后取车”，写了夫妻俩的好人做到底（帮忙修车）以及双方的友善互动。

句式有变化：使用了过去分词作状语 (Touched by...)，以及倒装句 (not only did... but they also...)，展现了较好的语法驾驭能力。

有对话互动：第二段加入了简短的对话，让人物形象更生动，体现了“Pay it forward (爱心传递)”的主题。🔍 改进空间 (Areas for Improvement)：

拼写与基础语法小错：

maintanence 拼写错误，应为 maintenance（或者干脆用 repair）。

trian 拼写错误，应为 train。

if someone travels to your town right? 这里属于与现在事实相反的假设（虚拟语气），建议用过去时 traveled。

细节上的逻辑跳跃：

外面正下着暴风雪（blinding whiteout），Emily是如何从咖啡馆去到火车站的？如果是Daniel和Rachel开车送她去，加上这个细节会让情节更严谨，也更能体现这对夫妻的善良。

词汇和情感表达略显平淡：

very grateful、really appreciated、big smile 等表达比较基础。可以尝试用更有表现力的词，比如 overwhelmed with gratitude (感激涕零)、beamed with joy (满脸笑容)。

结尾主题升华有些“生硬”：

文章结尾写她学到的教训是“多看天气预报、做好准备”。虽然很实用，但在这种以“陌生人互助”为背景的温情故事中，以“安全教育”结尾显得有些生硬，破坏了前面营造的感动氛围。建议将结尾升华到“人性的温暖/爱心的传递”上。✍️ 逐句润色与修改建议 (Polishing)

【第一段】

原句： And they would help to call the rescue company to pull her car out of the ditch for maintanence.

修改： Offering to take care of her stranded vehicle, they promised to call a towing company to pull it out of the ditch. （避免用And开头，用非谓语动词提升句型层次）

原句： Touched by the couple’s kind and timely help, Emily felt very grateful and said that she really appreciated everything they had done for her...

修改： Overwhelmed by their kind and timely help, Emily choked back tears of gratitude, expressing her heartfelt appreciation. （强化情感体验）

原句： After saying goodbye to Daniel and Rachel, she went to the nearest train station and got on the trian to Toronto.

修改： Daniel generously drove her to the nearest train station. Waving goodbye to her saviors, she boarded the train to Toronto. （补充如何到达火车站的细节）

【第二段】

原句： To her surprise, not only did the lovely couple arrange to pull out her car, but they also helped her get the car fixed.

修改： To her absolute astonishment, not only had the lovely couple arranged for the towing, but they had also paid in advance to get her car fully repaired. （用过去完成时更准确，体现出超出预期的惊喜）

原句： With a big smile on her face, Emily wanted to pay them for the trouble...

修改： Beaming with joy, Emily insisted on paying them back for their trouble and expenses... （词汇升级）

原句： From this experience, Emily also learned a lesson, which is: always pay close attention to the weather report and be fully prepared before a trip.

修改： The brutal snowstorm almost ruined her holiday, but the warmth of these strangers melted the winter cold, teaching her the true meaning of Christmas. （强烈建议修改结尾，将落脚点放在“冬日里的温暖”和“圣诞精神”上）。

🏆 升格示范范文 (Upgraded Version)

Daniel and Rachel suggested that Emily continue her journey by train. Offering to take care of her stranded vehicle, they promised to call a towing company to pull it out of the ditch while she was gone. Overwhelmed by their unexpected kindness, Emily choked back tears of gratitude and gladly accepted their advice. After finishing the hot chocolate, Daniel carefully drove her to the nearest train station. Waving goodbye to her saviors, Emily boarded the train heading for Toronto. Luckily, the train navigated through the storm smoothly, and by Christmas Eve, she had managed to arrive and hug her boyfriend tightly. They spent a merry Christmas together, feeling incredibly blessed.

Three days later, Emily returned to get her car. To her absolute astonishment, not only had the lovely couple arranged to pull her car out, but they had also got the damaged bumper completely fixed. Beaming with joy and relief, Emily insisted on paying them back for all the trouble and expenses. However, Daniel gently refused, smiling, "You would do the exact same if a stranger were stranded in your town, right? Consider it a Christmas gift." Deeply moved, Emily nodded, warmly inviting them to visit Michigan in the future. The brutal snowstorm had almost ruined her holiday, but the glowing warmth of these strangers easily melted the winter cold, leaving a lifelong mark on her heart.

满分范文示例：

为了帮助你更好地掌握高考英语续写的高分技巧，我为你提供两篇不同风格的满分范文，并分别进行详细的亮点解析。

满分范文一：侧重“情感渲染”与“圣诞奇迹”主题

这篇范文着重对比“暴风雪的寒冷”与“人性的温暖”，词汇高级，情感饱满，非常契合圣诞节的背景。

Daniel and Rachel suggested that Emily continue her journey by train. They assured her that they would contact a local towing service and look after her vehicle. Relieved by their well-thought-out plan, Emily expressed her deepest gratitude. Daniel then drove her safely to the nearest station. Sitting on the warm train, Emily watched the snowy landscape flash by, her heart melting with the couple's kindness. Hours later, she arrived in Toronto, where she threw herself into her boyfriend's arms. Surrounded by loved ones, she experienced the most meaningful Christmas ever, whispering silent thanks to her selfless rescuers.

Three days later, Emily returned to get her car. Pulling up to the local garage Daniel had mentioned, she was amazed to find her car not only rescued from the ditch but also washed and fully repaired. When she met Daniel and Rachel at the cafe to reimburse them, they firmly declined her money. "Consider it a Christmas gift," Rachel beamed, handing her the car keys. Tears welling up in her eyes, Emily hugged them tightly. The freezing snowstorm had trapped her physically, but it was the glowing warmth of human compassion that truly saved her holiday.

🌟 满分亮点解析：

高级词汇与短语：

well-thought-out plan (周密的计划)：体现出夫妻俩的靠谱。

reimburse (偿还/报销)：替代了普通的 pay back，更具高级感。

threw herself into her boyfriend's arms (扑进男友怀里)：动作描写生动，传递出劫后余生和重逢的喜悦。

句式丰富多样：

过去分词作状语：Relieved by... / Surrounded by...，使句子结构更紧凑。

独立主格结构：Tears welling up in her eyes...，极大地增强了画面的感染力。

主旨升华（对比手法）：

结尾句巧妙使用了对比：“The freezing snowstorm had trapped her physically, but it was the glowing warmth of human compassion that truly saved her holiday.” 将“冰冷的暴风雪”与“温暖的人性”对比，升华了“圣诞奇迹”的主题。

满分范文二：侧重“细节动作”与“爱心传递”主题

这篇范文更注重叙事的流畅感和人物间的互动，结尾落脚在经典的“Pay it forward（爱心传递）”精神上，非常符合高考阅卷老师的审美。

Daniel and Rachel suggested that Emily continue her journey by train. Seeing her hesitation about the abandoned car, Daniel immediately volunteered to help her contact a mechanic and keep it safe in his garage. Touched beyond words, Emily nodded in agreement. Rachel even bought her some sandwiches for the trip before they dropped her off at the station. As the train rolled out, Emily felt a heavy burden lifted off her shoulders. She successfully reached Toronto on Christmas Eve, greeted by her boyfriend's tight embrace. Though miles away from her car, she felt completely at ease, wrapped in the joy of the festival.

Three days later, Emily returned to get her car. Stepping into Daniel's driveway, she spotted her vehicle sitting there intact, its engine purring smoothly. The couple greeted her warmly like an old friend. To her astonishment, Daniel had already paid the towing fee in advance. "I can't possibly let you pay for this!" Emily insisted, reaching for her wallet. Rachel gently pushed her hand back, smiling, "Just pass the kindness on when someone else is in need." Driving back to Michigan, Emily realized that this unexpected detour had led her to the most beautiful scenery of her journey—the kindness of strangers.

🌟 满分亮点解析：

生动的细节与感官描写：

a heavy burden lifted off her shoulders (如释重负)：准确表达了Emily坐上火车那一刻的心理状态。

sitting there intact, its engine purring smoothly (完好无损地停在那，引擎发出平稳的嗡嗡声)：用 purr（猫打呼噜的声音）来拟人化地描写汽车引擎的声音，极为生动地说明车已经被完全修好了。

巧妙的对话设计：

“Just pass the kindness on when someone else is in need.” 借Rachel之口直接点明了故事的中心思想，不做作且极具力量感。

隐喻式的结尾（Metaphor）：

结尾句将这次糟糕的“绕道迷路 (unexpected detour)”比作人生旅途中的“最美风景 (the most beautiful scenery)”，化消极为积极，余音绕梁。💡 给你的备考建议：

无论是哪种风格的满分作文，它们都有几个共同公式：

第一段的“解题”：立刻接上段首句的建议（坐火车），写如何处理车 + 上车的心情 + 成功抵达目的地过节。

第二段的“转折与升华”：接上段首句（三天后取车），写车已经被修好的惊喜 + 拒绝收钱的互动 + 总结感悟。

情绪的递进：从前文的 Panic (恐慌) -> 第一段的 Relieved (宽慰) / Joyful (喜悦) -> 第二段的 Astounded (震惊) / Deeply moved (深深感动)。在写作时，注意刻画人物的情绪变化曲线。

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